Stocking up for the next inevitable period of unemployment

I still have to post July’s movie tally up and there’s an unfinished rambling about my visit to the New Beverly to watch a Duke Mitchell double-bill that will most likely remain unfinished. But hey, at least I can post these pics of a bunch of VHS tapes I bought at a video store! Hooray!

Scott Wolf is in the 1st movie. A friend told me once that he saw Wolf try to get into a sold out screening of Chasing Amy at the Laemmle 5 on Sunset. He ended up convincing the staff to let him in and he sat on the aisle. Intent to Kill is one of those movies from PM Productions, whose action and/or titty-filled products supplied junior high/high school me with much entertainment on those lonely Friday nights, of which there were many. Hostage stars Wings Hauser, the only white man badass crazy enough to believably play a pimp.

Manhattan Merengue was co-written and directed by the late Joseph B. Vasquez, the man behind one of my top 100 fave movies, Hangin’ With The Homeboys. It’s a sad story about that dude, and this turned out to be his last movie. Looking forward to checking it out. On a similar note, Hostage for A Day was the only movie directed by John Candy before his passing. I miss John Candy. I also miss Rick Moranis, even though he’s still alive. He’s doing his thing, I guess. Saw him promoting a country/western/humor album a few years back on Conan O’Brien’s show. Sarah Vowell was the other guest. It was like the coolest high school a.v. club/newspaper meeting that night.
I saw Xtro 2: Electric Boogaloo late one night in ’95. I was half-asleep and it creeped me out. Time for round 2, motherfucker. Evilspeak stars Clint Howard, who always rules. Lyle Alzado sure loved him some steroids.
Double Trouble. It’s the fuckin’ Barbarian Brothers, showing how big and strong they are by putting a massive hurting on big bad…uh…Roddy McDowell. Hmm. What a couple of assholes.
One More Saturday Night stars that annoying smug liberal retard-face from SNL. I think he’s Senator now or something. He did a skit once for Politically Incorrect; it was him and Arianna Huffington in bed. At one point she lightly hits him in the face with a pillow, and in return, I swear fuckin’ Stuart Smalley BASHES that goddamn pillow against her head. So fuck that guy, says the man who bought his movie. I remember liking Over Her Dead Body back in the day. The Premonition, I don’t know a goddamn thing about.
Undeclared War was directed by Ringo Lam. Run was a movie I saw at a theater when I was a kid and dug the hell out of. Underworld was written by the guy who made Mad Dog Time and Hell Ride, and directed by the guy who directed Battlefield Earth. So it’s obvious this’ll be good times.
Club Life looked interesting and it was distributed by Troma, so there you go. I think Rooftops is Robert Wise’s attempt at bringing some West Side Story magic to the ’80s. Rebel is probably one of those deals where Stallone is in it 5 minutes total but they sell it like he stars in the motherfucker. But hey, it’s a Paragon video and you can never have too many of those.
Never Too Young To Die was Stamos trying to climb up the lead actor ladder before slipping and landing on the life-saving cushion that was Full House. Heatseeker is an Albert Pyun flick and I’m a fan of the guy for some reason, so I have to check this out. I saw Hail Caesar on cable and all I remember about that is Anthony Michael Hall sincerely doing the singing thing and Samuel L. Jackson playing a mailman who gets attacked by a rottweiler.
These movies just looked cool, especially the 1st one, because you can’t get cooler than Lance Henriksen, except for Lance Henriksen in an igloo.
The plastic was falling off of this one. So Showdown had to hold it down. It looks like Kill Squad is such a badass flick, it seems to be creeping up to Showdown to sneak up and give it an assbeating of epic proportions. Look at that fuckin’ cover! It’s so awesome, it’s got to suck!
Stay gold, Ponyboy.
Sorry, Ms. Cobb — this guy rules. I can’t believe this motherfucker went from eating a live cockroach on camera, to taking it up the ass from a bunch of bees and crying about it. He still rules, though.
Monster Dog stars Alice Cooper and is directed by the guy who made Troll 2. If it’s boring, I’m gonna shoot the goddamn thing. I like the cover for Amsterdam Connection because it looks like random Chinese dude is about to get his ass handed to him by plainclothes Jesus Christ/everyday Jeff Lynne.
Lee Van Cleef is posing without a gun, cigarette and beret — it’s just that he’s so badass, it only looks like he’s posing with a gun, cigarette and beret. Exterminator 2 looks like good times because maybe now Robert Ginty will actually get to use a goddamn flamethrower, otherwise I’m gonna feel all Fool Me Once, Shame On You. Fool Me — You Can’t Get Fooled Again.
Almost forgot these 2 flicks. I remember A Million to Juan being the 1st movie I went to see at the theater by myself, setting off a lifelong tradition of not waiting for friends or family to be free in order to catch a flick. Mostly though, I just didn’t have friends to go with me. Waaah, waaah, poor me, poor douchebag. The Sudden Death cover intrigued me, for some reason.
Oh, I forgot these 3 too. I saw Delta Force 3 way back in the day. The cover is awesome because it trumpets the last names CASSAVETES, DOUGLAS, NORRIS, PENN but keeps the first names Nick, Eric, Aaron and Matthew small. Stag, I caught on cable back in ’97, it was one of those HBO premieres, back when they used to premiere direct-to-video flicks before they went direct-to-video. Both Nick Cassavetes from Delta Force 3 and Jeff Stockwell from Stag went on to more successful careers behind the camera, directing flicks like The Notebook and Blue Crush. I don’t know who the fuck is in Seven Deaths in the Cat’s Eye, or if any of them went on to directing careers.

Anyway, that’s it. That’ll probably be it for a long time. I have other things taking up my time, so it’ll probably be monthly tallies on this blog for a while.


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